Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
