is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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