used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
