do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
