Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Randomize