Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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