Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
