i permit you to call me
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Randomize
