i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
