The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
She's just so happy...and so naked.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
