There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I fill condoms, not promises.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
