Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
