google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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