No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Randomize