It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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