your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
