I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
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