just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
