at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize