I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
