RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize