And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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