he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
