Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
