Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Randomize
