I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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