mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
