is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
