if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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