I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize