I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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