just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
