i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
