ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
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