Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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