my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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