see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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