I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I need a beard to bite.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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