this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Randomize
