Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize