and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
