To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
