I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
