You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
