he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
where does the pee come out of this thing
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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