So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
