theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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