I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
