Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Randomize
