I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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