hell yes lets make some ravioli
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Randomize
