Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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